Three days to Recruitment Day: How do I feel?

Friday, 14/10/2016

On Tuesday I will interview with Disney. Wow. And I will interview not for a sale assistant vacancy in a Disney shop near my home, but to take part in a Cultural Representative Program at Walt Disney World in Orlando, Florida, US. Wow, wow, wow.

How do I feel right now? Well… Pretty nervous, and not very confident. Why? Let’s start from the beginning.

Four years ago – it was 2012, I was 18 and going through my last high school year – I applied for Cultural Representative Program for the first time. I didn’t know what to do after high school, but I was still pretty determined in taking a gap year before university. My favourite band was Bon Jovi (in fact I was completely in love with Jon), I read On The Road by Jack Kerouac multiple times in the previous two years and I dreamt so bad about moving to the States. Moreover, two friends kept asking my family going visiting them in Florida, trying to convince us by describing their house by the sea and talking about life there. To say it in a different way: I was constantly daydreaming about USA.

Then my mother came in and said: “Why don’t you apply with Disney?” Two friends of hers once worked at Epcot, and “they always say if they had the chance to stay all life long they were still there”. And I replied, “Why the hell didn’t you tell me about this before?”

Of course I applied.

Of course I didn’t pass the first interview.

I didn’t really expect to be employed. At the time I was like Alice in Wonderland, completely unaware of the real world. So I got my high school diploma, failed an application with EVS and enrolled in university in September 2013. It was the beginning of an amazing adventure – it didn’t look like that at that time, though. I had three great years, but every now and then I recalled my “Disney project”, asking myself what really went wrong with that interview, where and who would I have been if I had gone there, and so on and so forth. It wasn’t something I regretted, but an adventure I was still curious about.

What happened next? In July 2016 I got my degree in Languages, Cultures and Societies of Asia and Mediterranean Africa – yay! – and started looking for a job. Which I didn’t find yet. My purpose is the same as four years ago: taking a gap year, thinking about what to do next, and earning something to make that “what to do next” real.

Then, suddenly, the Signal: a Disney International Programs Facebook page post. “We’re recruiting, apply to Disney Cultural Representative Program!”

Why not?”, I thought. It wasn’t the gap year I had in mind (my heart beats for Asia now, you lost me long ago in Beijing hutong), but… Why not? I’m aware that my English needs some boostering, I feel like doing an experience like China, where I lived so far away from home with lots of people my age coming from all over the world, again, and I still have that an-adventure-I-am-still-curious-about feeling. And I applied again – and I passed the first interview.

And now here I am, three days to Recruitment Day and starting freaking out, because:

  1. I still have plenty to do to prepare myself for the interview;

  2. I have been reading blogs and watching videos about people who did the Cultural Representative Program for the past three days and they all seem much more qualified and excited than me;

  3. two or three weeks ago I read a statement by one of those guys which said more or less “It’s very hard not to pass the face-to-face interview!”, so I rested on my laurels but now it seems to me that such a sentence is something only a fool would think and there is so much I had to do and I did not because of that statement;

  4. I don’t feel as motivated to work there as I should be or, at least, as other applicants are.

I’m feeling nervous and I’m aware that’s only the beginning. How will I feel tomorrow, when I will have finished all the researches about Disney? And on Sunday, while packing my stuff to go to Milan? And on Monday, “planning” my interview? And on Tuesday,… On Tuesday?

I’m freaking out, and I don’t think I will succeed. Well, actually I still have to realize wether I don’t think I will succeed or I think that because I still think I will succeed for sure but I’m superstitious and I don’t want things to go bad after being sure of my success.

But I think I would be very surprised of receiving the You-have-been-accepted-! e-mail, or, at least, happy. Probably nearly as happy as the day I received the You-have-been-accepted-! e-mail for the exchange program in China.

Let’s see what’s about to happen.

Featured image: thanks to gullah.

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